Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize