I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will pee on everything he values.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Text me some of your sweat
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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