I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize