The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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