Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I can tuck mytits in my pants
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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