so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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