You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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