i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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