Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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