do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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