it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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