no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
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either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
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As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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