If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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