how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
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