I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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