I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize