Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize