He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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