Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize