I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
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Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
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just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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