I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize