i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I got chris browned last night
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize