I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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