i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
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