I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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