You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
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when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
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Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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