Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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