People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Damn victory sex feels great
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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