Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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