So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
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The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
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the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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