It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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