I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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