Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize