i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i think i have herpe
just one?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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