then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize