i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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