I think scott just propositioned me for sex
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
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I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
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how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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