Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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