Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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