Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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