Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize