She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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