The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize