PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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