not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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