Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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