I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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