my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize