Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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