Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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